and life drums on.. into the dusk

And it was as knife smashing through the glass vase filed with tender gels of healing makers dwells.

belief and faith knows no boundaries, yet fate often commands destruction and acceptance of it. would you have done the same knowing the outcome would be that of the fate written? Would it be possible to quench this sour slime of our social intimacy towards bitter sweet reconciliation? rude you. rude to them who cradles you, just of hurt them else pay scouring price. please not inate thyself to a saint as thine actions of innocence slices the very wholesome feed that cared-the hand that protects and the sheilds.

jus juss jussus another profession of amore

In the night so calm and lonely..
I can only long for your sweet presence..
Your tender touches, luscious kisses, seems absence..
Oh how this cravings of you in my arms amplified,
with surroundings unsimplified,
busy-ness, business, work work.
You have to know, you need to know,
every moment awake, every second paused, every break beginning and in between, and end,
You are the only thing on my mind.
every dream is build around, every goal inbound,
with one in mind, with you in every scenario, you in every possibility,
you in every of my ideas, my future
My thoughts with be incomplete without your inclusion.
Let it be known, that I have you on my priority,
it is to have you always the best I could present, offer and provide.

Deidre J Galasius, I adore you.

My Love..

I love you very much. I do not know how else to say it, but I am constantly looking for new ways to show my love for you. That is why I constantly lookout for lovely messages, ideas, pictures, poetry, song, anything to share with you. I know its not been an easy ride, with the distance and all our other differences.. I just ask of you to have your hands and work this relationship together; against all odds. You are my one and only, one true love. I love you more than anything else and I will love you more and more everyday--because everyday we create more and more memories of each other, more importantly with each other. I want to be with you every second of the day. To comfort you in times of distress, to pamper you when you're tired and worn out from the day, to assuringly hug you and cuddle you to bed, and to share every moment in your life from now till eternity. This picture is an inspiration for me. I know its emotionally challenging at times without our physical presence around each other.. I hope our story would continue be something like this story in the picture.. I assure you my sayang, that i will do everything i can to nurture this beautiful relationship with the most wonderful person in the world-My Deidre Claire-Philomena Justin Galasius.

Smile, and believe. Everything will be alright. It should, it would right?

amidst a love gushing tsunami, amidst a passion ravelling touch. A love so deep, so pure, so anxious. So afraid, looking at the scars--dents of ravage.. As jingle bells are ringing, white Christmas without presence, turquoise-eyed drives the hurting unknown. dragging along hope, hope that is pure, Trust that rock is sole and solid. Like the Kinabalu, Like, the Kinabalu. Light the Kinabalu.
Is that you Santa clause?
You light my days-sun, guide my night-lighthouse. Instil live back into passion emotion. You greet me sayang; doesn't it mean something? I am restless, i am sleepless. I need to know, I die of curiosity-where I stand? but i could not know, not now though. not if we are apart, because, it is not right-not substantial electronically, digitally.
I yearn for that touch of flesh again. It was real, it was. It was me, I Love You.
:-X

Pada Syawal yang Mulia...

Blessed Eid ul-Fitr and Maaf Zahir dan Batin.. Salam Aidilfitri.. Haven't been able to check in with the blog for longest time now.. probably cause I've not been too affected recently? Maybe its disassociation. But today is an auspicious day indeed.

Raya aidilfitri as we say in Malaysia has always been a celebration to look forward to. More so this year than ever, however that dream was short-lived. Many things I had in mind, many ideas of raya, many scenarios. It would have been perfect, the timing would have been perfect. I always wanted to share Ramadhan with someone, properly berbuka with the family and celebrating Raya helping out with the open house or simply visiting. Now, see how this Would Have been perfect to indulge myself into the culture and family. I so wanted to be a part of all this and I really open to everything. Still wondering what is she up to and how is raya over there..

"I dont know whats happening with you but I missed you"

Owh, its a wet raya here around my area. Its just something about the rain that soothes the soul and calms the spirit. Was in a friends open house, one I must visit every Raya. This truly was a 1Malaysia open house. There were vast variety of people, food and drinks. Beer and wine catered for the non-Muslim, all and everyone is jolly happy chattering about catching up with old friends and meeting new ones. I love this open house best. Have not had any open house beat this yet.

Standard Chatered has been good. People there are friendly, bosses intimidating and assuming. what a combination.. LOL. everyday I meet someone new and get this question, "but you're a photographer, what the heck are you doing here in a bank?" I usually just laugh before repeating the whole reality tv thing with "Nokia The Rookie" that story never fail to draw attention.. i likes attention.. hehehe.

anyways, here's some random rants i've been collecting in between this post and the previous..

nicest feeling cant stop talking
"Hi heart, Meet and old friend, dagger" says brain.
possible something to deffinate nothing!
And here it goes, the emo continues.. haha.
Ever felt like you've in the wrong place at the wrong time? Like everything
has a time and place i understand but not you apparently. you have no time
nor do you have place among the society you're in.. wow, how crappy can
things get. motivation and demotivation is such a subjective thing that
either one frustrates you the with such similar propensity that it drives
you nothing but anoying nuts.

How tired I am of this unbarable distance between up
How I long of the toll of the recess bell
Have you forgotten me?
Grown mindless of me?
Tell me I'm not writing into an abyss,
or thats what will become of my heart

someone once asked, "why do you love me?"
and I felt so lousy i couldn't answer her.
then I realised how pure the feeling was. There is no material or feelings to compare to or equate. It was not 'subjected' to something. It was wholesome. So much so even if she breaks a thousand times this soul will still hold

Let go when you're hurting too much. Give up when love isn't enough. Move on when things aren't like before.

friends..
it was trouble when the first person you see when you wake up is also the last person you see when you fall asleep.
trouble is proximity, and i always said, really counts.
that's exactly growing to love a person, or some might call it falling in love with the person.

Oh her eyes, her eyes
Make the stars look like they're not shining
Her hair, her hair
Falls perfectly without her trying

She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day

Yeah I know, I know
When I compliment her
She wont believe me
And its so, its so
Sad to think she don't see what I see

But every time she asks me do I look okay
I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

Her nails, her nails
I could kiss them all day if she'd let me
Her laugh, her laugh
She hates but I think its so sexy

She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day

Oh you know, you know, you know
Id never ask you to change
If perfect is what you're searching for
Then just stay the same

So don't even bother asking
If you look okay
You know I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

The way you are
The way you are
Girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

did you know...

that

At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.

At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.

Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.

You mean the world to someone.

If not for you, someone may not be living.

You are special and unique.

When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it, but if you trust God to do what's best, and wait on His time, sooner or later, you will get it or something better.

When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good can still come from it.

When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world.

Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.

and you!

season 2 finale. like seriously what is up people's head? yes we are all thinking creatures. we are called to think. so think before speaking. there are so many possibilities, too many in the universe in fact. In time of confusion, do not hesitate, do not assume, most importantly do not shut our intuition out, conscience, in lay-er term; gut feeling. Scholars and philosophers have said before; realisations are revelations, when it comes it is usually enlightening, sometimes regretful, Joyous, and sometimes, too late.

Treat people righteously, give them the respect, gratitude and all they deserve. Even if you are unsure, it does not mean someone is to be a sacrificial lamb here. Though it is a separate issue all together that they are willing to. People and things come and go day in day out. we hurt those closes to us, but they are still there. They who believed in us when we had no faith in ourselves, held us when we lost our balance, caught us when we were falling, cradle us when we fell. WHY? Why so? of course! its this thing call love cos it cant be obligation, it cant be anything else. And yet we know we could treat them better. Priority given, priority taken, priority all messed up. There is only so much humans can do out of obligation. look at prayers for instant, people pray out of obligation and when they're in trouble. How often do we truly praise God, thank God, in prayers?

When was the last time you said 'Thank you' and meant it. Do you remember what was it you were thankful for? Friendship, is it overrated these day and age? I tell you what it is, taken for granted that's what it is and so is all other form of relationships.

What is the most valuable thing in your life? why?
Can we live life simply? not simple, simply. Ask yourself.
Tepuk dada, tanye selera.

I'm ever greatful to have done what I did, met who I meet, share what I shared, give what I gave, feel what I felt. Thank you. I know I am alive. I know how to appreciate.